Dear Inner Circle,

A country boy landed here in Kings Cross a couple of months ago. He’s built like he could pick up a sheep in one hand and put it into his pocket. A disastrous experimentation with drugs caused him to leave everyone he knows and shelter in the anonymity of Kings Cross. He used to sit at our front pathetically trying to prevent himself from falling to the ground under the influence of drugs. He said to Una, our Senior Community Worker, one day, “I’m not the no hoper you think I am. I’m better than this”. Una replied, “Don’t tell me about it, show me!” Today I had a conversation with the same man. He’s drug-free, clear-faced, bright-eyed and truly present with us. He’s working hard at the gym to bring his strength back. It’s a joy to stand with him and behold the transformation. If we can find him a job soon, there’ll be no looking back.

The same fellow came to church last Sunday and we asked him to read the scripture for the day. He agreed to do it but was clearly nervous about taking a public role. I saw him several times in the morning reading in whisper the passage he was to present. Another beautiful bloke, who himself has overcome a heroin addiction to lead an inspiring life, wanted to encourage the big country boy. “Just imagine we’re all naked,” he said. The reply was, “Bro, you’re not helping.”

Keep reading here.

Dear Inner Circle,

An appointment in Pitt St this week took a little longer than I expected, making me late for another meeting back at Wayside. As soon as I was out of the lift and headed for the nearest cab, I started to text the crew at Wayside to tell them I was on my way. I’d only taken a couple of steps on the footpath when I kicked what must have been a stick. I didn’t fall, but having lost my balance, I turned to see that I’d tripped on a white cane, held by a man wearing dark glasses! Thankfully the man didn’t stumble but he had stopped in his tracks. I don’t know if he was annoyed or frightened. My embarrassment level multiplied by a large factor and I offered my most profound apology.

Engaging in formal study is a daunting task for someone who can’t read or write. I spent some time yesterday with a fellow who grew up as a kid on the streets of Kings Cross. He was literally born on a park bench to an alcoholic mother. He lived a life that appeared to be destined for incarceration and early death. Yet I was looking into the face of a man fully alive. He’s been entirely free of alcohol for a while and he’s a fit, healthy looking man today. He’s been embarrassed by his complete lack of education and learned ways to dodge and dash to divert being noticed for his weakness. Yesterday we sat in my office and raised our glasses of water in a toast to his successful completion of a Certificate 3 at TAFE. What might look like a small step is a massive victory. There will be a graduation ceremony next year and I think the TAFE are inviting me to be a guest speaker on the occasion. What an achievement, what an honour! Thank God that Wayside never gives up and never writes anyone off as being too far gone.

Keep reading here.

Dear Inner Circle,

“Dad, I’ve just chosen a nursing home for you!” My daughter must have thought this would be welcome news! She said, “It’s really close to where I live and if I get any calls in the middle of the night to say, ‘Your father has gone walkabout’, I won’t have far to look.” How good is it to have a daughter that is looking out for my best interests…a long way in advance.

A dad with a broken heart wanted to tell me what a beautiful son he had and so we gazed into some photos. He only had a dozen photos and some of those were school photos. Recognising anyone’s kid from a school photo is a tough assignment. There were a
couple of photos of a strong, healthy-looking boy in carefree days. People of good will often avoid talking to a grieving parent about their deceased child and that might be the right tactic for some but this man wanted to talk about his son. He wanted to hear his son’s name in the air.

This morning a young wife could barely speak as she told me that her husband had sunk into such despair that suicide was looking like a real option. She was talking about a man who has everything going for him and yet cannot make headway on a project of importance to him. These two have a net worth way beyond mine (perhaps not a good measure of wealth) and they have everything they need. They love each other and they have three adorable daughters. It’s a relatively easy matter to slip into a deep depression even when you have everything in the world. While I don’t know the man so well, it seems he’s formed a habit of spending every waking moment focusing on what he doesn’t have rather than what he does have.

Keep reading here.

Some kids come to life as soon as you go outdoors. We took our eight-year-old and 10-year-old granddaughters to the beach recently. The first request to get to the beach came at 5am but we insisted they have breakfast and eventually at 8am we were on the sand. The kids ran almost involuntarily, leaving two old grandparents out of ear shot and doing their best to say, “slow down” and “be careful” and all manner of things that grandparents seem compelled to say. Finally all four of us stood between the flags in our bathers. Eye contact with the 8-year-old was impossible. She was in a state of awe as she looked to the vast ocean and the crashing waves. “Let’s do this!” she said as she pulled me into the water.

Being human is not a matter of capturing moments. Being human is nothing like taking a photo in order to capture and experience and file away a memory. Being human is an act. It’s an activity. Being human is about being captured by the awesome, grabbing a nearby hand and proclaiming, “Let’s do this!”

Being human is not a matter of outcomes. There is a place for goals to be set and outcomes to be measured but it rarely causes anyone to say, “wow”. Being human is not about knowing how much water is in the ocean or what the temperature it might be. We have so much to learn from children.

A kid not only sees the awesome but they know somehow the awesome is waiting to be done: It not about simply appreciating the mighty but rather knowing that the mighty is in need of us. Our puny strength is no barrier to the calling of life to be lived.

The mighty mission of The Wayside Chapel is creating community with no, ‘us and them’. It’s important that we see it, hear it, smell it and know that it needs to be done. It’s about love overcoming the forces of separation. “Let’s do this!”

This post originally featured in The Wayside Chapel's On the Verge newsletter, read more stories from On the Verge [read more]

Dear Inner Circle,

Golly gosh what a few days it’s been! I had a letter that informed me that I would be named in the Queen’s birthday honours list and that from Monday, I would be entitled to put the letters “AM” after my name. My daughter informs me that I am now officially a morning person. My theory is that the letters stand for “Amazing Mates”. Creating community with no “us and them” is my destiny toward which I move with my whole being. Anything that I’ve ever achieved has been a result of an effort by Amazing Mates. It could be quite misleading to pin a medal on my chest as if there was some kind of singular achievement.

I couldn’t accept an award that asserted individual achievement. If however this award is akin to the athlete that holds the flag in front of a team of athletes as they march into an Olympic venue, then I’m proud to be a leader of Amazing Mates and hold a flag of achievement and pride on behalf of such Amazing Mates.

Keep reading here.

Dear Inner Circle,

Let me tell you the loveliest thing. A new rose has been developed and it has been named the Marie Bashir rose! What a fitting way to pay tribute to one of the most loved people in this country. A Marie Bashir rose is to be planted in Government House and I’m honoured to tell you that I’ll be there when this takes place. Typical of the beautiful lady that is being honoured, every rose purchased will see a small royalty sent to The Wayside Chapel. How lovely is this? How lovely is the incomparable Dame Marie Bashir?

Minutes ago I met a young girl and she sent me packing. We’ve spoken only a couple of times over the past year and each time seemed like I captured an important moment. Today I saw a 60-year-old face on a 20-year-old body. She looked into my face and I saw her face harden. She yelled, “No! Go away!” I get it. We’ve shared a couple of moments of being present to one another and they were powerful encounters. Right now, it’s not what she wants. Indeed I can see that she’s doing her best to manage her rather out of control life and she needs to be free to manage. I understand that no one can live in the bare present. It must be known briefly and quickly left. I think i
t’s how life is and should be. It is impossible to organise life in the present. I’m certain we can live in the bare past where life is experienced and things are used but this is not human life.

Keep reading here.

Dear Inner Circle,

Here’s hoping we don’t get a severe fire season next summer because I fear the response of our government will be to disband the fire brigade. It is true that whenever we have fires, those pesky red trucks show up and I’m pretty sure that if we could stop the trucks, we’d solve the problem of fires. While I’m solving the country’s problems, have you considered how hospitals are a black hole for money? Have you seen the way these things attract sick people? They are a veritable honey pot for the sick and by building them, we’re sending the wrong message to the public. Ambulance drivers are akin to people smugglers, making a living on the back of people’s suffering. Surely if we could stop the ambulances, the sick would think twice before flocking to hospitals. Really it should be we who decides who will be sick and the manner in which they will be treated. I can hear the slogans of our next election, stop the boats, stop the firetrucks, stop the ambulances. OK, I’m being stupid but I’m hoping that by laughing, we might see how pathetic is the behaviour of our country in the face of so many people perishing at sea.

A young man, a warmly dressed and articulate fellow with the loveliest face, told me this week that it was addiction that put him on the street. He’s fighting the addiction and it’s a daily struggle. Last week he took all of his money and gave it to World Vision for their work in Nepal. He’d rather starve himself than throw his money away on his wretched addiction. What a struggle and what a beautiful heart is revealed, fighting for life and survival.

Keep reading here.

Dear Inner Circle,
Our ambassador, Kylie Kwong, brought her entire team into Wayside yesterday for a talk and walk around Kings Cross with Rob Holt, our Community Educator, who was once on the street. I’m certain the day opened their eyes to a side of this city that could be known no other way, and that I guess would help weld her team together putting most of their problems into a healthy perspective. People who order noodles in our cafe on Friday don’t realise it but they are eating straight from Kylie’s kitchen. We’re a class act here.

Last night getting out of a cab on my way to a speaking engagement, the door flung open quicker than I expected and connected with a flash looking white BMW. It left a mark on the paint but I couldn’t tell if it was a scratch or a mark that might rub off. A woman got out of the flash BMW and I apologised and handed her my card. I told her that if the mark didn’t come off that I’d be glad to get it fixed. She said, “I’ve come here tonight to hear you speak.” I love cars probably more than I should and if I owned a lovely BMW like this one, it would be hard to be gracious about someone damaging it. As the night passed, the BMW owner become more and more gracious. At the end of the night,
I gave her a copy of my book and so from a most awkward beginning we ended the evening in mutual admiration and bucket loads of thanks to each other. It could have been a disaster but grace transforms negatives into positives.

Keep reading here.

Dear Inner Circle,

“Hey, Papa, one of my friends got into a lot of trouble today,” said my 8-year-old granddaughter as I met her at the school gate.

“Really,” I said, “Why did she get into trouble?”

“She was accidentally talking,” she said.

“‘Accidentally’ talking? Baby, you should consider a career in the law.”

“What?” she asked!

“Darling, please say these words for me, ‘Accidentally, Your Honour’”

She repeated the words and I said, “That’s it, I’m saving for a wig and gown”.

My girl looked at me like she recognised this as one of those grandfather moments for which there isn’t an explanation and that it wouldn’t be worth her energy to try and help her old grandfather make any sense.

“Can we get an ice cream?” she asked.

It was my turn to pull a facial expression, waiting for the ‘magic word’ that unlocks the heart and wallet of all grandfathers.

A beautiful little face looked into mine and after pause she said, “Your honour”.

There’s been lots of talk around the SBS program Struggle Street this past week or so. I’m probably not the greatest authority on this subject because most of the people we work with at Wayside, aspire to Struggle Street. The thought of having a roof over your head and the struggle to pay rent and find food and clothing, sounds like luxury to most around here. I saw the program and warmed quickly to each of the characters whom I thought were revealed in their vulnerable but wonderful humanity. I thought SBS made a pretty good job of it however some who had some serious misgivings are far better placed than I to make a judgement and I differ to them. Jon Owen and his wife Lisa choose to live in Mount Druitt where they raise their young family. Jon and Lisa run something that is akin to Wayside but it all happens in their family home. They are inspiring and probably a little crazy. I’m sure they are crazy in the same way that Ghandi or...[read more]

‘Mission’ and ‘vision’ are both words that indicate a forward look. When we talk of our mission, we are looking forward as far as we can see. When we talk of vision, we are looking forward beyond what we can see. Whenever we ask the question, ‘What do we want to do” the discussion that follows will be about ‘mission’. Whenever we ask, “Who do we want to be” the discussion that follows will always be about vision.

Wayside’s mission is to “Create Community with no Us and Them”. That’s what we aim for in everything we do. Sometimes we hit mission and a phenomenal burst of life and transformation takes place; sometimes we are miles away from mission and simply in a state of “wishin”. We’ve learned that mature leaders are those who don’t panic in the wishin stage but rather use it to sort our stuff and look to be captured by our mission again.

The phrase, “Love over Hate” describes our vision. We want to be an organization that lives on the intersection of love and hate. Often enough, it’s a dangerous intersection. We want to find our place in the intersection between the haves and have-nots; between the Christians and the Muslims; the theists and the atheists; the in and the out; the sick and the well. We want to be a people who live in this dangerous intersection in a way that maximizes the chances of love prevailing.

We don’t own our vision. We can’t franchise our vision. Our vision is always out there, always ahead, always calling us to be more. If we could be experts in our own vision and seek to proselytize, we would have destroyed our vision. Our vision admits no experts. No formula leads us to our vision and when we really get it, we emerge with no formula. We do not go to people and say, “Believe the following propositions and you’ll get it”, instead we say, “Walk with us and you’ll get it”. Or allow us to walk with you and we’ll get it.

Our mission is our boat, our sails and our rigging....[read more]